South Melbourne Circuit

Today I had the pleasure of the South Melbourne Circuit. My tour guide, or Master as he prefers to be called, lead me on an eatery tour of South Melbourne Market which was meant to end with an Andrew's burger. According to Matt Preston, searching for Melbourne's best burger ends with paying homage at Andrew's. Matt Preston is an internationally acclaimed and revered food critic. He is best known for his weekly restaurant column in The Age newspaper’s food section, "Epicure", and as a judge on MasterChef Australia. Please also note, that he was Anthony Bourdain's tour guide in the recent Melbourne episode of No Reservations on the Travel channel. Are you convinced yet?

Sadly, we did not make it to Andrew's because as it turns out Andrew's is closed on Sundays. Fail. Don't panic, we did have a burger eventually but let me lead you through the circuit first. It was an epic adventure which I hope to repeat several times during my stay in Melbourne, preferably with visiting family and friends by my side.

First stop. Dim Sims (aka dim sums). South Melbourne Market (http://www.southmelbournemarket.com.au/) is a large undercover market with a wide range of produce and general goods. Picture eastern market times 5. You had the choice of fried or steamed dim sims. I know it might be hard to believe, but I chose steamed. For about a buck fity you get this delicious lime sized ball of pork goodness. killer.

Second stop, seafood stall. Freshly hand shucked (holla to my Old Ebbit's degenerates) oysters. We ordered a dozen, 6 creamy and 6 salty. Get your mind of the gutter now and focus on the circuit. The oysters were amazing. A little Tabasco and a little lemon was just a delightful treat. I learned something exciting which my dad, the food police, will appreciate.

Oysters are not only delicious, but they’re also one of the most nutritionally well-balanced of foods, containing protein, carbohydrates and lipids. The National Heart and Lung Institute suggest oysters as an idea food for inclusion in low-cholesterol diets. Oysters are an excellent source of vitamins A, B1 (thiamin) B2(riboflavin), B3 (niacin), C (ascorbic acid), and D (calciferol). Four or five medium size oysters supplies the recommended daily allowance of iron, copper, iodine, magnesium, calcium, zinc, manganese and phosphorus.

Third and Fourth stop, olives, olive oil, wine and beer tasting. Delicious and fun. The little beer/wine stall was patroned by a friendly little man who ranted on a bit about alcohol and the low-carb myth. As most of you who know me all, I always appreciate a good rant. A few fun facts (and a transitive proof): Alcoholic beverages all contain calories, and most of the calories come from the alcohol. Alcohol is not a carbohydrate. Alcoholic beverages have calories because alcohol has a lot of calories—not because of carbs. The implication that low-carb beers and wine are helpful for your diet program is simply BUNK. I can hear my mom tsking right now. I know I know, one drink is like 10 points (WW reference).

Finally, we head to Andrews for the burger. I have been looking forward to this burger since my lovely tour guides (Satya and Jac) have been selling this gem of a place. Our hearts were nearly broken. Andrews is closed on Sundays (I know I repeat myself but it is meant to convey the depth of my disappointment). We had to find an alternative. Greasy Joe's (http://www.greasyjoes.com.au/) would have to fulfill our insatiable quest for a burger on this fine Sunday in Melbourne. I ordered a cheeseburger and Satya and Jac ordered the Lot burger. Good lord, as you can see from the pic, the lot burger was insane. Egg, bacon, cheese, beetroot (yes beetroot), onions and greenery. I do not condone these condiments, if you can call them that???!!! The burger was OK. not great, not bad. It was a bit dry but good flavor.

All in all it was a great day and I sincerely thank my tour guides for a job well done. I will appreciate the Andrews burger even more now.

xoxo

Jilly

The Black Squirrel

We have another guest blog. enjoy.

A few Saturdays ago I was invited to a friend's beers and burgers birthday bash (say it 5 times fast!) at Black Squirrel, in Adams Morgan. The place was jumping and the hipsters were sucking down German beer and burgers. I returned on a calmer Tuesday night to test it out.

The menu makes a big deal of the burger: "Our Burgers - are made of hormone-free Hereford beef ground in-house. Hereford beef is an ancient bread of cattle that has not been genetically engineered. The result is a mouth-watering, natural-beef flavor. Hereford is an all-natural, hormone-free beef raised strictly on corn. It is allowed to mature naturally without the use of drugs, which results in a higher price." Having just read the Omnivore's Dilemma, I was skeptical about a place that touts beef raised on corn, but gave the burger a go.

The plus side : you can choose from a plethora of cheeses to go on your burger: brie, cheddar, blue, goat, gruyere, swiss. The negative side: they charge 50 cents for pickles!! Wot da wot?! The burger arrived and, unlike most places in DC, the medium arrived with some pink in the middle which I felt was a good sign. (See previous posts about Founding Farmers in particular). However, my optimism didn't last past the first bite. The meat had waaay too much salt and some specific spice (cumin?) in it. My dining companion agreed, miming the chef seasoning the meat while being distracted with discussions of the Sweet 16 rather than paying attention to portions. Also-- fries too well cooked so that they acquired the hue of an Oompa Loompa and the consistency of shirt cardboard. Between two of us dining, we didn't finish one portion of the fries. That says a lot.

Even though I did this taste-testing as an unofficial outing of the Burger Club, I would say that I took one for the team here. You don't want to bother with it. But the beer was good. Czechvar that came in a glass with its own name on it! Fancy.

- P. Deeks

The Espy Burger

1st Burger report from the Land of Oz

http://www.espy.com.au/

I didn't follow the yellow brick road, but I did happen upon a unique burger club experience at the Espy in Melbourne. The Espy (Hotel Esplanade) is, as I am told, a Melbourne institution.

"For over 100 years the Esplanade Hotel has been Melbourne's (and indeed Australia's) premier live music venue. Since the early days of string performances in the late 1800s The Espy’s hallowed stages have been graced by the finest performers from around Australia and the world."

By chance, we ended up here on a Monday night (don't judge) which is $10 burger night at the Espy kitchen. Why on earth would you turn that down? Keep in mind, this sweet deal includes a pot of beer, glass of wine or glass of sparkling wine. No contest, I had a glass of champi. The Espy kitchen was seedy, but just the right kind of seedy. It was filled with hippie backpackers, rugby looking dudes and skinny punks wearing Ramones t-shirts...you get the picture. My type of place. They have a small outdoor terrace which is coincidentally opposite the beach and said to be a great spot to the watch the sunset. I will have to save that for the next visit, as we arrived well after sundown. I will admit that I was a bit hungry when the burger arrived but it was a solid effort from a seedy bar/music venue kitchen. I was impressed. The bun was a bit of a fail, but I will let it slide as the atmosphere and company made up for a slight slip in quality control. Maybe it was the grain fed australian beef, maybe it was the dread locked scandanavian girls next to me talking about their travelling conquests, maybe it was the beautiful clear warm starry night (insert 3 glasses of Rose prior to dinner) or maybe it was just being somewhere new, cool and being present as they say. I will go back to the Espy for the music, for the food and for the fun.

Disclaimer: That last cheese part may or may not have been a tiny marketing pitch for visitors ;). Either way, you should come.